Life is a choice. It is YOUR life. Choose consciously, choose wisely, choose honestly. Choose happiness.

[CHRISTINA]

REGRETS OF THE DYING

For many years I worked in palliative care. My patients were those who had gone home to die. Some incredibly special times were shared. I was with them for the last three to twelve weeks of their lives.

 

People grow a lot when they are faced with their own mortality. I learnt never to underestimate someone's capacity for growth. Some changes were phenomenal. Each experienced a variety of emotions, as expected, denial, fear, anger, remorse, more denial and eventually acceptance. Every single patient found their peace before they departed though, every one of them.
When questioned about any regrets they had or anything they would do differently, common themes surfaced again and again. Here are the most common five:
1. I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
This was the most common regret of all. When people realise that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.
It is very important to try and honour at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it.
2. I wish I didn't work so hard.
This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children's youth and their partner's companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.
By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.
3. I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings.
Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.
We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly, in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way, you win.
4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.
It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip. But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks, love and relationships.
5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.
This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called 'comfort' of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.
When you are on your deathbed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long before you are dying.
Life is a choice. It is YOUR life. Choose consciously, choose wisely, choose honestly. Choose happiness.

http://www.inspirationandchai.com/Regrets-of-the-Dying.html

http://www.davidicke.com/headlines Monday, 09 January 2012 10:45

[CHRISTINA]

Love back your way! Great Soul that you are Trudy :)

 

[Trudy]

Yes we do that CHRISTINA by staying in our Truth, the Truth of the Heart ^L^

Love ya Great Woman ;)

[CHRISTINA]

sadly enough, there are a few players who cheat at the expense of the 99.99% and mother Earth.

stop their cheating!

[Trudy]

Like my aunt, the sister of my father always proclaims this during her life, said : Het Leven is een toneelspel en wij zijn de hoofdrolspelers in dat spel.
Life is a play and we are the PROTAGONISTS in that play...

Yes capitals again, cause in the mean time the play isn't in our hands anymore!!!

[CHRISTINA]

it's just a ride :)

we can enjoy the highs and lows or remain unruffled like mr bean

 

life is about making choices and experiencing the consequences of those choices....

 

[JIM4HOPE]

I have had plenty of moments that I would not trade for nothing and I have did experience a few that I wasnt to happy with but over all THE HAPPY BY FAR OUT WEIGH THE BAD TIMES FOR ME .I like Bill Hicks description Its just a ride .

[CHRISTINA]

“When I was 5 years old, my mother always told me that happiness was the key to life. When I went to school, they asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. I wrote down ‘happy’. They told me I didn’t understand the assignment, and I told them they didn’t understand life.”

― John Lennon

[CHRISTINA]

Trudy, yeah, go for it!

Like my mum said, before her transition, her last advice was: "Go for Happiness in Life!"

Happiness and Joy are our birth right!

[Trudy]

When I became consciously there was only one way to go and that was to be honestly and therefore I choose wisely to abandoned my family and all the money attached to it, and choose happiness in a very austere life ^L^

[Bishop]

im really hating work at the moment, especially the feeling of no way out of it. if i fail to turn up, i risk losing the job, then it will make it near impossible to find another, and i wouldnt be allowed benifits either for leaving it. i kinda feel like the only way out would be through some kind of serious injury. I really wish i wasnt feeling this way, i really with i could easily find something less demanding and more fullfilling. :(